I wanted to escape; to run and free myself from the bondage of who I was.
I long to rip away the bandage and face the scars of my past.
I wanted to be stronger.
I desired to feel; to really feel alive.
I gave into despair and now I cringe.
The memories of my lost years are creeping back into my being and I am afraid.
Afraid of seeing myself.
The self that I left long ago in the backwoods of some dark country road.
The self that sips from the cup of loneliness and smokes the trees of desperation.
The self that allowed various demons to crawl inside of her, leave their marks and disappear into the night.
The self that stills clings to broken promise and memories.
I need to escape.
I must break free before the weight of self, destroys me.
Will I be destroyed?
Or will I rise up and survive?
My story is unfinished. My ending unknown.
All I know is……
I must escape; run and free myself.